This journal entry is from chapter 3 "The End" of New Moon...hope u guys like it. Let me know if u want me to write anymore entries :)
THE END
he is not here anymore
my hope is on the line
I never thought i could lose my mind like this for him
because suddenly he didnt love me anymore
because my life is full of emptiness
nobody answers my questions
because i have nothing left without him
he is gone...the sweet perfume smell of his hair
he is gone...the sound of his whisper
he is gone...his beautiful smile
he is gone...the sweet honey flavor i tasted on his lips
he is gone...only his love has stay
he is gone...and my love is now cover ice cold
he is gone and my life with him left
he left and now i only have tears coming down my face
hammered down here every lonley night
i'll go anywhere for him
not a lifetime is enough with him
what can i do if he is gone
in my summer the sun doesnt come out anymore
he brought the storm that destroyed everything
breaking in a thousand pieces those dreams we dreamed of yesterday

if there is a god he must remember me
even though i know
that between him and me the sky only has black clouds
i'll beg him...i'll look for him..i swear i'll find him
even if i have to look into millions of stars
in this life, dark and pointless without him
i feel he has become center and end of my universe
if there is a limit in love i'll cross it for him
and in the enormous emptiness of my nights i'll love him
like the first time
that i kiss from him was a lifetime
and i got lost on his lips....

WAKING UP
he has left to never came back
the morning train comes now without him
is just a heart with a metal wall in the gray fog that covers up the forest
his place is empty but he is still inside me
i feel his breathing and think he is still here
not even the enormous distance can divide
two hearts sharing a heartbeat

if you think about me
if you dont want to talk to anybody
if you hide like i do
if you press yourself agains the pillow
if you cry if you dont know how bad will this silence be

i cant look at ur pictures with ur curious eyes in them
i cant press it against my chest
i still think you are here between english and math
if you think about me
and ur friends might help you
u are trying to forget me
i know its not easy
in class i cant take it anymore
in the afternoons is worse

i've sunk myself in my studies
my mind wonders about you
is impossible to divide like this our lives
why didnt you take me with u?
u didnt conserve my ilusion
the lonelyness betwenn us
the silence inside of me
i cant survive life wihtout u
this cant be happening
its impossible to earase our history


ADRENALINE
I ask myself if this would help bring him back
in an instance i felt how he was unforgettable
it looked like another story that time took with him
i didnt wanted him to leave me
while i miss him even more after hearing him
he is more inside of me

i wanted to let him know that i wouldnt forget him
i heard his voice twisted in anger
they're still in me like a tatoo on my skin
i hear him but i know he is not there
i look for him but i know he would not come back
on my lips i feel his just like he used to kiss me

he is of my property and i would not give him up
even if he wanted to get away i would not let him
he would not leave me again
while i hear his voice again i fall in love more than before
i would let him go anymore because if i looked up to the sky
he'll be unforgettable to me
he wold not let me go now and while i thought about it
it became true he would be unforgettable

while i miss him more
he is more inside of me
i would not let this go
even if he was not here i'll alway hear him
hear that unforgettable voice

THIRD WHEEL and THE CULT(what jacob said)
You know he is not going to come back
you know that he lied to you
all the time you've lost for him
he didnt keep the promise and he broke it
its a problematic love
not like you and me we're different
you keep waiting by the phone like he is going to call
u are waiting for an adventure that is not logic
its like he has leave his venom without remedy to cure it

cant you see am tearing up inside!
and you suffer because he left!
what kind of love is that is not a logic love
that love is so dangerous that it might take the real bella away

our love is differnt havent you notice that
i make you laugh within your tears
how maney blank pages have you filled up with new stories
so that you wouldnt write the authentic ones
this love is the kind of love that our spirits approve of

how do u know if that love is real
how many more nights are you going to cry for him
how many times are you going to remember him again
how many times are you going to go through ur memories
reviving all those stories full of pain
thats a problematic love
its up to you to forget them!